Friday 19 February 2016

10 life lessons I learned this 1 month holiday break

Finally, my 1 month holiday is coming to an end with only about a week left, and its time to get back to uni to start getting busy.
During this break, I have taken some time to do self-inquiry and reflection about more of what life is all about. I don't wish to get deep into this, as recently I think that life doesn't require so much analysis. I was once so into self-help or personal development stuffs by reading tons of materials about it. And I realize that I have been missing out on life. Doing some self-reflection for a short time can be great, but spending way too much time to figure about life is just a waste of the precious time. To sum up what I learned throughout my pursue towards a better version of myself is that life is all about experience. And its a cycle of learn and move on. However, if we choose to hold onto the past and not moving on with life, we will suffer.

Not forgetting those awesome people that I went out together (or those that we interact virtually) this holiday, it was a blast being with them ! Each of them are unique with their expressions and I learn to love them equally as the person they are without imposing on them my expectations of what a friend should be like. I learned the most when I am going out with my friends. They helped me to change my fixed perspective on certain aspects of life and broaden my views about how exciting this world is.

And some lessons I learned recently this holiday:
Life lesson 1
When we are upset by the action of others, it is still not about them. It is never about them. It is about who we are believing them to be. Its our perception of who they are, and it can be true or false.

Life lesson 2
Ultimately, the relationship we are going to have is the relationships we have with our thoughts. 
How do we react when we see others to be unkind, uncaring, manipulative? We may build up our defense systems and start building the "protective" barrier to prevent ourselves from getting hurt. Separation occurs and we no longer feel connected with others.
If we truly want to connect with others, we need to listen carefully to what others say or perhaps beyond it - We thought that they are trying to hurt us with their words, but sometimes they are just being honest in their expressions without the intention of hurting us.

Life lesson 3
One person may not want to be involved in your life, that doesn't mean others won't. Instead of getting angry or frustrated being ignored or rejected, use that as a burning fuel to strive towards a better you.

Life lesson 4
We hate it when other people's truth doesn't match with ours. As much as we hate it, there sometimes can be some substance behind what a person believes in. Be open minded and see what opinion the other person has to offer.

Life lesson 5
The world is a dynamic place where anything could go right and wrong. There is no certainty or fixed outcome. No one would know what would happen the next moment. And that is the exciting part about life - the unknown.

Life lesson 6

You don't need to be totally free of fear to try new things in life. You have got to decide that you want it more than you are afraid of the fear(eg. wanting the experience more than the fear) Be strong about your intention of why you are trying the new things, that could be the strongest factor to motivate you to continue exploring the new.

Life lesson 7

Don't be sad about your losses and waste time on thinking so much about it, keep forging forward and something good will come to fruition.

Life lesson 8
Changing people, places or things is impossible and hopeless! Let them be. We can offer people help to change for the better, but ultimately we should always respect the decision of how they want to live their life.
The only person we can change is ourselves - the way we choose to perceive or respond to certain incidents in life. (Realize how hard it is for others to convince us to change our fixed belief.)

Life lesson 9
Life is so much more fun without needing to analyze every seconds of it.

Life lesson 10
When we put ourselves out there in this world, whether we are performing in front of the world or seeking for love etc., we are taking the risk of our audience not responding in the way we opt for. Any failures, rejections, divorce should only be looked at as one event in life, and never our whole life. Get out and get "crushed"! And build yourself up again into a stronger version than before with the shattered pieces - we are stronger than we think. 

Additional: Be grateful. For all the people and all the events in your life. Cherish those who you love and those who love you. Group hug everyone!

Till then, take care beautiful people!